In my first newsletter of 2019 I’m going to profile Bregman’s latest book entitled “Leading with Emotional Courage” , but in today’s post I’m going to look at the four ingredients of the book;
1. In my line of work I see a lot of confident leaders – some perhaps overly so, but when they hit the coaching space it’s often because they have become unnerved, either in a new position or in transition,
and they are not particularly gentle or compassionate with themselves.
2. Connection to others is tricky for some, particularly for my more ‘thinking-oriented’ clients.
But where most seem to trip up is generally procrastination surrounding ‘difficult conversations’.
I put together a module on this very subject last year and whether in personal or work life, these conversations continue to face and challenge us.
3. Commitment to purpose: most of my clients are clear about what it is they wish to achieve, but what often surfaces is being focused on the most critical tasks that will ‘move the needle’ as Bregman says, rather than succumbing to the scattered chaos.
This year I conducted an exercise with my time-stretched client where we took a clear week a few weeks into the year and plotted the most critical tasks first (pure thinking work) and then plotted meetings around them, rather than vica versa.
4. Emotional courage is the subject of the whole book and Bregman’s final criterion and probably the most challenging of all. These are the risks that we are called on to take, which leave us feeling vulnerable and often avoidant. Taking baby risks, on a daily basis and ‘feeling the feelings’ while doing it seems the only way to push through this hurdle. Saying ‘no’, declining a meeting or confronting inappropriate behaviour are small examples, but Bregman’s claim is that,
using emotional courage builds your emotional courage.
I’m going to give it a go!